So, if we haven’t met yet then you wouldn’t know. I like people. I’m an extrovert. I LOVE my friends, deeply. Too often though I get to thinking that I’m not contributing to my “tribe” unless I’m telling a story or relaying a message, somehow adding value to our collective experience. Case in point I was at a party last week and it was loads of fun, we were all having dinner and talking and the sounds of the forks were clinking against the plates. The night was alive. And somehow I managed to begin telling a story that caught the attention of the group and a hush fell on the air, and there in that moment, I’m mid apex and boom. Self-doubt creeps in. The lie that wants to eat at you while you draw from your cup. I felt my confidence flicker, like a flame in the wind, and so I paused. Pausing these days isn’t super common. It doesn’t really happen a lot naturally in my experience, because I’m a talker, I like stories, I love the build of a good tangental conversation in all the best ways. And I really love to float in the river of inspiration with other people and see where that takes us! Is it metaphor, is it philosophy? Is it alchemy? I don’t know, but so often it’s fleeting. And so I realized after I finished my story and the audience was let loose, I felt the slight whisper of imposter syndrome. Am I good? Am I kind? Does this bring honor to what I’m doing? These are also things I talk about in my book.
Is it good?
Is it kind?
Does this carry honor?
And so I realized that in that moment, my ability to share my message is just as important as my (and your) revelation, idea or wonder. BUT!
Yes the BUT. Herein lies the rub…
Just because we have the idea or have the revelation doesn’t necessarily mean we have to teach it to everyone at our table. Some people will catch your drift and feel the wind in your sail, and others won’t. And that’s ok. As for me and my house; I truly want to sail down the river of inspiration. I want to see the banks and trees and catch the sun in the canopy that covers us. My biggest fallow is I want to bring you with me. Let me be your tour guide and I promise not to dissapoint. There’s too much going on in the world to stay idol.
This is why we need eachother. We still need to tell stories and share what we have with our friends. Within that context we can then begin to build community with one another.